Our song might be keeping things clean and tidy, or making tables, or loving people who are difficult to love. I’ve been wondering about what my song might be.
Last week our esteemed Dharma teacher visited our little Buddhist group in Malvern. Before he arrived I was a teensy bit frantic – making sure that everything was ready, wanting to make a good impression, running at a million miles an hour.
Afterwards my friend thanked me for getting into such a state, because as he watched me he had an insight into a similar trait he recognised in himself. He hadn’t realised how he’d behaved at the beginning of a group he ran himself, and suddenly saw it reflected and magnified in me. As he told me the story I smiled wryly, glad to be of service to him.
Maybe my song is to be foolish : )
On reflection, I think my song really is to be foolish. Singing my song means writing newsletters like this one, where I own up to being very human and show you that it’s really okay. We are acceptable just as we are.
This is also what happens in my novels. My characters find out about their own foolishness, and then have an experience of being accepted – Joe by his aunt Nel, April by Art, Ruth by Red and by herself.
Being foolish and being loveable anyway. Even when I really don’t feel loveable. I can live with that. I’ll keep offering my foolishness up.
What might your song be? How are you currently singing it in your life? How would you like to sing it? Do share your thoughts in the comments.
A final confession. My friend forgot that he’d told me about noticing my foolishness, and he told me about it again in front of some different friends. The first time he recounted it I’d been amused, but this time I was a teensy bit tired of having my foolishness pointed out and I pretended not to hear him.
There are layers and layers and layers. Trust me. And it’s all okay.
In other news I’m planning a big online event, Grateful May, I hope you’ll join me. And if you’d like to listen to me talking about burning flapjacks (with my Buddhist priest hat on) you can do so here. Go well _/\_